Entries Tagged 'Homelife' ↓

Why is it vacations are more tiring than the work I left behind? Mybe it’s the fact that I didn’t have time to fully recover before heading back to work today, but I’m exhausted. Nevertheless it was fun getting away.

I spent last week in St. Louis and other more rural parts of Missouri, traveling with family to my nephew’s graduation from Washington University. It was a fun and relaxing escape from NYC that allowed me to throttle down about 180 degrees. We stayed in time share property, the upside of which was the ability to live pretty much the way we do at home, eating our own meals on our own schedule, living in a “home” and not having the noise of inconvenience a hotel would offer. And for the time we were there, it was at a fraction of what a hotel would cost. The downside was it was 90 minutes from the city one way, which meant a commute in and out every day. I earned my membership in the Teamsters last week.

Being that far out also subjected me to my first tornado-like conditions. The storm that crossed the nation’s midsection the weekend of the 10th, passed right over us, and frankly scared the hell out of me. I kept expecting the building to lift off the ground and start swirling around before crashing down on top of a witch.

The storm made the already shaky satellite tv service even more sporadic and cellphone use wasn’t much better. Without a laptop or the internet, we were pretty much in a news vacuum all week. I missed the earthquake in China, the California Supreme Court ruling on same-sex marriage, and only got a little of the news on last week’s Democratic primary. Truth be told, while I missed those stories, I didn’t mind being disconnected from equipment and media that can so often consume my life. It was nice not checking email every day or reading blogs, while running the television in the background.

Time away also allows you to put many things into perspective. It is time for some serious changes in my life. I came home to an apartment in serious need of a makeover and restarted the work week bored by the very thought.

A little vacation, traveling with and to see family and a nephew’s college graduation, means I’ll be away. No blogging and probably limited internet access. I’ll see you in a week. Feel free to rummage through the old entries. Some of that stuff is actually quite good.

Sunday was my birthday. I turned 48.

It’s not one of the big milestone birthdays like 40 or 50, just a run of the mill day that went largely unobserved. I received cards from family and friends, a bunch of emails and phone calls, even some instant messages wishing me well on my day. In between watching the NFL playoffs including my Giants’ exciting victory over the suckass Cowboys, I managed to treat myself to some homemade lasagna, a dish I enjoy but which takes a lot of time to prepare. My birthday gift to me.

But every birthday presents an opportunity to reflect on the past and contemplate the future. I don’t make New Year’s resolutions as much as I set out goals and objectives for the year. Pardon me for sounding so business-like, but helping nonprofit boards do strategic planning is what I do for a living so it stands to reason that I might also guide my own life so logically. As it so happens, a few weeks ago, I sat down and used the same procedures I use with organizations to set out a 3-5 year life plan for myself. It has more to do with putting my personal finances, career plans and home life needs in order.

As I plan for tomorrow, I do so with the awareness that tomorrow isn’t guaranteed to any of us. Even though I probably have fewer years ahead of me than I do behind me, today’s birthday allowed me to think about some of the fun dreams I still have and experiences I still want to have.

So, borrowing a page from the new Jack Nicholson-Morgan Freeman movie (and no, I’m not being paid for this plug), here are some of the things I still want to do before I “kick the bucket.”

Buy a house. Home ownership is still the American dream. I grew up in a house but ever since I was in college, I’ve been an apartment dweller. I presently own my apartment and plan to leverage it for my retirement in years to come, but it is still an apartment. A house has land around it.

Travel. I want to drive across country. My family did that when I was four years old and even at that young age it was one of my fondest childhood memories. I want to do it again as an adult. I also want to go abroad, visit London, Paris, South Africa, Brazil and China.

Write a stage play. Or more accurately finish writing a play and see it staged. I’ve got self-discipline issues when it comes to my writing. Deadlines help. I’m working on it.

Get licensed to sky dive solo. I’ve already done a tandem jump a few years ago and plan to do another probably in the spring. But I’d like to go through the process of learning to jump solo. Coupled with that dream, I’d like to

Learn to fly an airplane I probably need to do that sooner rather than later while I still have some eyesight left. But it’s a dream I’ve had since high school.

And just for the fun of it, I’d like to get my commercial drivers license. Not that I have any plans to be a truck driver, but I’ve always wanted to learn how.

Of course now, if I win the lottery, then I’m gonna get my CDL, buy one of those rock star tour buses and drive cross country, then learn to fly and take my self to Europe, Africa and South America, while my play is running off Broadway. You just watch me.

Have you ever had someone show an interest in you that made you take notice of them even when you had no prior interest? An old fashioned courtship of sorts, where they took time to get to know you and acted like they wanted you and only you. Who doesn�t want to be wanted? All that attention can be flattering to the point where you forget your own needs and just get drawn in.

So you commit and start a relationship with the hope that it will go somewhere. But then, reality creeps in and right off the bat you sense something is wrong. This is not quite the pretty picture you were expecting. The gut never lies and there�s an uneasy feeling settling there that tells you this may all be a big mistake.

What do you do? Do you stick it out and hope things will change, or do you follow your instincts and cut your losses before things become worse. I chose the latter.

That new job I announced in this space just a week ago is no more. I lasted five days, Monday through Friday. Shortest stint in my entire working life. Barely a ripple on the r�sum�.

They wanted me and made that clear early on. I was flattered and sorely in need of a job when they first started talking to me. Perhaps I was too vulnerable, never a good thing when trying to start a relationship. I was also a bit conflicted, because I had also interviewed for another job in an entirely different field for which I won�t know the outcome for another few weeks. Did I want to wait and have no offers on the table or take this one and see how it works out? I gave in.

The position was in a field related to the one I was in for the past five years, so I kind of knew the landscape already. But this particular place had an entirely different operating style from the last one, where I�d grown very comfortable and always felt supported. For one there were fewer resources. Far fewer resources. Like a private office space. A desk by the office door in a common area with two other people, and where those in the three inside offices are also doubled up, means there is no privacy for anyone. Forget about personal matters, even work-related phone calls become everyone�s business or conversations in hushed tones.

Then as I got about the tasks I was assigned it became clear to me I had done this all before. Talking with clients about matters I had dealt with in the previous job gave me a sense of d�j� vu. Nonprofit social service work is all about trying to save the world and I hadn�t accomplished that on my last job. Without the equipment to even put up a good fight, what made me think I�d get any closer on this one? Beyond a paycheck�doled out once a month, mind you�what was the upside? Suddenly that part-time work I do in the evenings seemed infinitely more pleasurable.

My schedule will now fill up with additional hours on the part-time gig while I await word on the other position that I really want. It has the potential to put me in a position to live in the style to which I�ve grown accustomed, in my mind anyway, offering me work more in keeping with my skills and abilities and affording me a retirement plan that won�t leave me a broken down senior citizen. Such are the priorities of a middle aged man.

The series is over. Now back to more mundane posting.

The odyssey that began last May has ended. I am back in the labor force as of Monday. It actually pays more than the last gig.

However a few weeks ago, to give myself something to do and keep me from completely depleting my savings, I also picked up a fun little part-time job that I�m still working even with the new full-time, for now anyway. I�m an usher here. Basically, you stand for several hours, hand out programs and direct people to their seats, in exchange for seeing a great show every night.

Tuesday night was a marvelous tribute to New Orleans, with a phenomenal (!!!) young tap dancer whose name I didn�t get (no, not Savion Glover; Savion wishes he was as good as this kid). Monday night was a benefit for autism with Bill Cosby and Toni Braxton. Cosby kept us in stitches, while Toni whispered through her songs and put us all to sleep. Unfortunately she went on first.

Working at such a high profile arts venue in the entertainment capital of the world also gives you lots of chances to celebrity watch. In the past two nights I got up close with Glenn Close, saw former NY Knick Earl �the Pearl� Monroe, and ex NY Giant Tiki Barber, Stanley Crouch and attorney Barry Scheck. I personally seated Maya Rudolph and Lorne Michaels from SNL, and NBC News anchor Brian Williams, then spotted SNL�s Kenan Thompson at the after party.

But in a job like that you also quickly learn the difference between the haves and the have nots. New York City is not without its quite obvious class distinctions. Hard working, low paid ushers, security guards, catering chefs and wait staff worked tirelessly to make sure the rich and famous had a wonderful evening. I sure hope they appreciated it.